In a reality and world where fitting in is still a major part of a developing human, the teen years and early adult years are no different in that regard. The need to belong to a community, to a group is built into human functioning: family, neighbourhoods, friends… Structures even copy that format: SRCs,SGBs, school districts, department of education… all groups of belonging.

So FOMO is real, and that it hits us in a very real place. And it hurts! Ka khulu futhi. You know those hormones are just always stirring the pot. Just out here being spicy because they can.

Cortisol stresses the body out

• Adrenaline & Norepinephrine along with Cortisol are anxiety
• Dopamine is released in the body when others are having fun and you are not, so you feel the need to check social media so you feel the same rush of Dopamine

Ntwana there are other hormones too that give us the FOMO ouch! Kuningi. So when you say NO to “i-party yo mhlaba” and the intense FOMO what are you actually saying yes to? The fact is “i-party yo mhlaba” may be a vibe for the night but it probably isn’t aligned with your goals. Choosing your goals, choosing you, can feel like the end of the world. It can feel like the worst, most dreadful thing ever! That is the hormone tornado taking the mind and body for a whirlwind.

Dial it back to the beginning of this year and think about what you set out to achieve. When you say no to FOMO you choose the results of the goals you pledged to be devoted to. Devotion is certainly not dessert. It is not always fun. It is going to require laser focus and doing the non-group oriented stuff. That’s what it takes to get where you want to go. Remember, everyone loves the idea of being a champion but not everyone will eat right, think right, and work out almost everyday if not everyday.

It’s hard not having fun when everyone else but it’s harder not having the results you know you are capable of because you let a fleeting moment sway you from your goals. You’re on the right track and your future self will thank you.